New Year – New Beginning. Starting off 2021 has some different challenges for all of us. The pandemic is still roaring through our world, so we are still isolated to some degree. Thank goodness the vaccine is now being administered. Hopefully, we will have this awful Virus under control and we can all get back to a life we use to know. We need for all the businesses to be open and people back to work. We need income and housing for everyone and food on the table so no one is hungry. I think we use to take these things for granted, and now we all look at the basics in a different light. 2020 has been such a devastating year for so many and for all of us in some way.
As I try to create a new life after losing Jim, I am ready to change things up. The life Jim and I shared doesn’t exist anymore and never will again. I miss him more than words could ever express. My heart is still shattered into a gazillion pieces, but I want to cherish our memories and the wonderful man he was and the love we shared.
I need to find something to fill the void. I don’t really want a job, but I would love to be involved in something. I really need to feel productive and that I am contributing to something. I’ve been thinking about various Charity Organizations. I applied to Dress For Success, I think that would be a great organization to get involved with. I have donated to them for years. They also have a mentoring program that sounds interesting. Hopefully, after the new year, they will open up again and I can see if that is really a good fit.
If I purge my closet I am sure I have even more to donate.
I also want to broaden my blogging network. I now have more time I can devote and would love to expand my content and share more of my skills, as part of my New Year – New Beginning.
Maybe more “How To”
DIY Cowhide Chairs – $9.99 Trash to Treasure
“Cooking”
5 lbs Ground Round – 5 Easy Meals
“Cook Once – 5 Meals
“Decor”
How To Get That Modern Farmhouse Look
“Room Makeovers”
I need to find ways to broaden my social circle too. Jim and I did so much as a couple. I need to learn how to join in as a single and create more single friends too.
I want to create a new life that reflects me and also honors the life we created together. I am not sure what that is at the moment, but I am open to try new things and see what doors will open in the future. I know there will still be times when grief overwhelms me, and I am still trying to piece my shattered heart back together. I love and miss him every minute of every day. He was the most wonderful part of my world.
I am just one of the thousands that lost loved ones during this Pandemic. Sadly that’s a huge fraternity. All of us are facing the same realities. I know I am not alone in trying to move forward. I constantly pray for everyone. We could all use a little help. For all of us, this will be a “New Year – New Beginning”.
Any ideas or suggestions?
Dear One, I’m without words to comfort you as you have experienced this year the way you have. I’m so very sorry for your loss.
d
My heart breaks for you, Marty. I can’t imagine what you are going through during this time but I am also very inspired by your strength and determination. I’m sure your ability to look towards the future and to make plans to give back will set such a wonderful example for others. Wishing you health and happiness in this new year.
Take care friend,
Shelley
How quickly your life changed with the loss of your dear husband – I know many prayers have gone up for you. Our church has a dear lady who started a widow’s group after she lost her husband very unexpectedly; she is amazing at encouraging these ladies to get out, finding fun activities, and providing such comfort to them. I’m not sure what they’ve done during this past year but they used to get together for games every Friday night at her house, go to lunch every Sunday after church, celebrate birthdays, etc. She always has the best ‘field trips’, too. Her ministry to these dear ladies has been a lifesaver for so many. I pray you find just the perfect ‘match’ for your ministry as she did.
Volunteering is a great use of your time, and you might find those friendships you are seeking thru that, too. Two birds one stone. Wishing you the best in 2021.
B
My heart goes out to you! I cannot imagine going through what you have gone through. I so admire your spirit and attitude and am so grateful you have such wonderful memories to sustain you! My prayers are with you!
Happy New Year, Marty! This year will bring you lots of joy. I love your zest for life and your positive attitude. Cheers to the new year!
Marty, as I read your words, I see a “cup half full” resilience in you. As you alluded to, there will be times when that cup is “half empty” or “completely empty”. I admire your desire to keep moving forward and being an asset to others. Having your family nearby is a huge blessing. I hope your ideas pan out and you are fulfilled helping others. God’s blessings to you in your new year-new beginning.
I admire you so much Marty. I know some days must be hard but your strength is amazing.
Dress for success has always sounded like a great organization.
I will continue to keep you in my thoughts.
Cundy
I loved reading this – that you can acknowledge the loss and sadness and still want to move forward is such an inspiration. Statistically, we women outlive men. So I know that I will be facing the same challenges some day. Your grace is inspiring! You have a lot to offer in the way of ideas and How To’s. I feel like expanding your blog is a great start!
Marty, I really admire you for having the desire to contribute. One of the areas/skills I notice as a common thread in your blog work is your organization. You might want to get involved with an estate liquidation business of some sort, even just as a helper, not as a real job. Their biggest task is organizing for the sale, and you certainly have the eye for diamonds in the rough. From hosting so many blog parties, you certainly know the worth of those diamonds in the rough. You’d be a great asset to a team that does this type of thing. One of my favorite estate sale hosts here in our area had a network of gal pals who assisted her in doing this, and they were/are a great group of friends.
Whatever you choose to do, I’m certain it will have good results!
Hugs to you Marty…
Marty, if comfortable with this suggestion, pray or talk with God re where does this road you’re on now lead you. You might find He may respond quickly and then again more time may pass. as He’s working behind the scenes in what’s to come into your life! I’ve had situations where in chatting with Him within two weeks there was truly an answer to my prayer, and I was like WOW!! Where are your strengths in helping others? What will give you a new sense of purpose and joy?? I recall your Jim being a master gardener, as I am too – do you like to garden? Are there garden clubs in your area? Granted they may not be meeting right now. And know you can still expand your blog (great idea BTW!) while still involved with other interests. Sounds like you’re on the right track……… We’re here for you if you care to discuss/share more on this new chapter in your life……. Hugs……….
Marty you certainly have been one of those really unfortunate victims of Covid with losing Jim and being so sick yourself with it. I am so happy to read your post today and that you are ready to move forward and enter into some new things in the new year. You are so right with knowing you will never have the life that you had with your sweet Jim but it is so wonderful to hear you say you are ready to move forward and maybe fill your time with some new and wonderful adventures. Dress for Success sounds like a great organization and with your wonderful talent of putting together beautiful outfits that would be a great venture to get involved. Doing more with your blog would be so wonderful too. Happy New Year and good luck with all the new beginnings to come.
A strong woman wants to move forward and start a new life and that strong woman is you. I admire that you are able to take steps forward but still recognize you can still grieve. I am sure some of that comes from the happy life you had with Jim. God bless you as you find what fits for you and hopefully our world will open up so you will have more choices.
I volunteer at an animal shelter and love it. If you don’t want to work directly with the animals there are plenty of other things they need help with. I agree that your church probably has groups to join or if senior centers are open they would have activities too. With your outlook yOu will find something that you enjoy
Marty, I do enjoy your blog, have learn so much from you. My heart goes out to you for loss of husband, can not image the heartache you are experiencing even this year. I have learn that we can not know how another feels until we have walked in their shoes. I admire your strength to move forward, and continue helping others thru your blog. I like your idea of post about cooking, how to, decor and would like to see more on matching up and mixing up different outfits. Hope 2021 brings much happiness to you
Bless you, Marty, as you continue to carry on with your extraordinary grace and strength. Your love radiates across the screen and I hope you can feel it reflected back to you. Best wishes are with you.
Praying for as you honor the past and move to the future. I don’t know if you read the Sweet Tea and Sandals blog but they both were inflected with COVID as she wrote “ COVID is not a death sentence “ I had chills all over and sadly she also lost her husband to this deadly virus. Praying for all that have an empty chair at their table.
So sorry for her loss too. I will pray for her too.
While I have no suggestions I just want to say I admire the way you’re thinking ahead, looking for new things to plan and do as you re-invent your life for the circumstances you find yourself in. I’m amazed at the strength and fortitude you’ve already shown and look forward to reading about what unfolds as you move forward. You are an inspiration.
Marty, your brave, optimistic and positive attitude is truly to be admired! For mixing in with new people and filling time with something new, I would suggest seeing if your local library has a book discussion group – a.k.a. book club. Though reading is wonderful on its own, having a set timeline to read the chosen book each month would ensure you to devote some time each day to get your mind off of things and help to pass the time in which you’re not cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, organizing, blogging or decorating. My current library’s book discussion has gone virtual, using Zoom online sessions, for the timebeing for caution and safety due, and has looked into doing spaced, socially distanced meetings until people can sit together in a close circle of chairs again. The discussions are not academic, or intimidating – they mostly involve how the books made us feel, our favorite quotes, and what we liked, didn’t like, or didn’t understand (open endings, plot twists, etc.) I have not attended the in-person or virtual discussions in a while as I’m working remotely and more hours than ever but I do keep up with my personal reading (and listening to audiobooks on CD – also from the library – wonderful!) since I love it and it helps make me a better writer. I know all towns and cities are different, but the people who attend my small town library’s book club are all women, mostly in their 60s and 70s, so it might be a nice, no commitment, niche for getting out there in the non-couple world. I’ve also gone to open garden club meetings in surrounding towns for flower arranging events, etc. when they’re open to the public as I’m not a member. Those were really fun too.
These are all such wonderful suggestions. I will check into the library and see what they have going on. I could probably find book club too. Thanks again. Marty
I was alone for 11 years but my situation was different than yours. My husband left me for another woman for 11 years. I basically raised my girls alone. He came back when they were juniors and seniors. I know the lost feeling. I can’t change that for you but I can offer one thing..find girlfriends. After I retired I joined the Red Hats. I am sure you have groups in Phoenix because it is an International organization. Prior to my joining all of my friends were nurses like me. It was refreshing to meet people from other walks of life. We still meet, although our meetings are by Zoom mostly. Just a suggestion. Hope you have a better year.
Marty, you are a strong talented lady whom we all admire. When the fit is right for ‘something’ you will know. Doing something with your hands or mind keeps you busy. I so admire all you have accomplished by putting one foot in front of the other. My daughter lost her husband suddenly three years ago and she still struggles because she doesn’t have a big circle of friends. Sometimes when you are a couple, you drop friends and do everything together.
One of my friends went to grief and grieving class years ago. The best thing she learned was writing a letter to her late husband saying how she felt without him. No one has to read it but you.
Know that you are in our prayers and rooting for you.
My deepest condolences.
I understand.
Thank you for sharing.
You have such a great outlook and open mind. The willingness to broaden your circle, to try new things, and different ways to fill your time shows that you are one resilient lady!!!!
I wish you healing in 2021.
I am so sorry for your loss Marty. Your willingness to put yourself out there and try new things shows so much strength and character!! I have admired your blog for some time. I too am trying to grow my readership….perhaps we can collaborate on a weekly or monthly post? I would love to chat further about it.
Best wishes Marty for a healthy and happy yet different new year.